I have another good news vs. bad news post for you this morning.
I have been diagnosed with cancer. It’s lymphoma (a blood cancer). It’s one of two kinds that are hard to tell apart on the biopsy: Diffuse Large B Cell Lymphoma or Burkitt’s Lymphoma. These are non-Hodgkins Lymphomas (good news).
That is the bad news.
This is the good news:
This cancer is “curable.” The best case for me would be if it is only in my back (so far it is). That would take about 4 cycles of chemotherapy (R-CHOP) followed by radiation treatment at that site. The worst case would be if it is also in my lymph system, bone marrow, or brain (we’re still checking). That means about double the cycles of chemo and additional radiation. Right now it looks like between 4 and 8 months of cancer treatment ahead for me.
These are fast moving, aggressive cancers but I am young. They want to be as aggressive with treatment as they can be. They will push my body as far as they can to eradicate this disease as quickly and completely as possible.
More good news (my take):
– I find amazing peace in finally having a diagnosis and being able to start treatment so that I can be well again. I am ready to fight this cancer.
– This is not a death sentence.
– They say these chemo’s are better tolerated than others. I’ll be weak and sick as you might expect but it could be worse.
The more I speak with my doctors, the more they reveal about just how miraculous my surgery was. Many of us have been praying for God to work a miracle in me but have seen things seemingly turn from bad to worse. It’s hard to reconcile that. I think the miracle He delivered just looked different than the one we were asking for. We wanted them to find a benign tumor (or no tumor at all). The miracle He delivered was life itself. That’s just like Him though, right?
When the tumor was removed, they found two nerves that were destroyed and leaking spinal fluid into my back. Based on what they saw, it’s amazing I can still walk and that those nerves didn’t provide a superhighway for cancer, infection, or both to reach my brain very quickly. It is recovering the feeling from these two nerves (that control a lot of vital functions) that is now my biggest challenge.
It was also a miracle that I survived surgery. My blood pressure dropped to near zero during the final titanium screw installation when I was bleeding and they were topping me off with plasma. My heart started beating at >200bpm trying to get blood moving but it was not creating any pressure. They flipped me onto my back as fast as they could and it took 90 seconds of CPR chest compressions to revive me and restore blood pressure. My doctor’s comment was that most hearts would not have survived it. I am thankful to be alive. Maybe that’s the miracle we got when we thought we were praying for another.
What’s next?
– Today I will leave OHSU’s hospital and be transferred to an inpatient rehab facility. There, they will help me to learn how to function without those two nerves that were destroyed by the tumor.
– When I am strong enough and able enough, I will return home. This could be days or weeks.
– Oncology can’t start cancer treatment until my back heals. Chemo stops cell growth and I need lots of healthy cell growth in my back to heal it before they start killing the cancer. My neurosurgeons want 3 weeks of time from the surgery before my first chemo dose (so at least 2 weeks from now).
– I’ll be on IV antibiotics (and then oral antibiotics) to fight infection for a very long time.
Please pray for these next two weeks. Fighting cancer is going to be hard but I’m starting from a point of weakness already. Pray that rehab goes well and my nerves heal or I regain/retrain their use. Pray for healing of the back surgery site and any infection. Pray that I am strong enough to start fighting cancer in 2 weeks. Most of all, take a few minutes to thank God for the miracle that I survived surgery and that despite nerve damage and complications I can walk.